Hilary Weeks New Christmas CD

Hilary weeks new christmas CD is coming out fairly soon.  I actually really like Hilary Weeks and am excited to hear her new CD.  If you want to check it out you can go here.

Pictures

Offended

So recently I witnessed a situation occur at church that really offended me.  I felt like one party involved was really inappropriate.  It really depressed me.  I took it fairly personally, even though it was not directed at me.  It involved adults, just so you all don't think that I am talking of teenagers.  I have not really resolved it yet and as I thought more about it last night it came to tears.  Certainly this past week has been hard and with everything else going on I'm sure that part of my despair is in fact due to other circumstances.  I began thinking of ways to control the situation so that I do not end up hurt again.  As I thought about what had happened I began to rationalize that this ward is not really my home ward.  It is my student ward, so really not mine at all.  Just a temporary place for me to be.  I thought if I stop going to the less mandatory activities that there would be less chance of offense.  You can see where this train of thought is headed.  But as I followed this stream of thought it lead to me to my testimony.  I love Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ much more than I feel offended.  I can get over my offense in order to maintain my promises and obligations to the Lord.  Really that is what gets me up and motivated to chase down 2 little kids and force them into church appropriate attire every Sunday.  That is what prompts me to continue to read scriptures to my daughter who tries to pretend to fall asleep, walk on the wall, sing at the top of her lungs or otherwise thwart my spiritual attempts every night.  It is faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and our loving Heavenly Father that pulls me through temptation and trial alike.  I'm certain that it will pull me through this one too.

The Cleveland Clinic-A First Hand Review

So today I ventured out for the first time to the Cleveland clinic.  Josh had an appointment with the pediatric gastroenterologist at 8:00 am.  We arrived at the actual hospital campus/building just after 8:00.  After refusing valet for $10.00 total I was directed to the nearest parking garage.  First hour = free.  Second half hour $4.00 and so on until you reach a $10.00 maximum.  Yikes.  The parking garage had a tunnel connecting to each of the nearest buildings which was a nice amenity.  We headed to the 11th floor and checked in.  We got there at about 8:15.  The secretaries were really nice about us being late.  They never said a word and when I brought it up they said that it was fine. We waited about 30 minutes in the waiting area and they were packed.  Then we went to our room.  We waited about 1 hour and 15 minutes.  That felt like a small eternity.  All the while I was thinking about the parking fees.  Abby was just about ready to burst out of her skin and Josh was determined to figure out what would happen if he shoved his pudgy little hands into one of the many uncovered outlets in every area/room of this place.  The doctor came in.  She seemed smart but then she tried to give me a mask for Josh to wear because he coughed once.  When that obviously failed she excused herself and came back with a mask.  She then took the normal history where I repeated myself well over 3-4 times per question.  Then it was time for the physical exam.  Josh squirmed a little bit and she once again excused herself to get a nurse to help her hold him down.  hmmm.  The nurse came back, now masked (she wasn't before we saw the doctor), and Josh laid perfectly still.  He was perfect.  He didn't even cry.  She then said that Josh likely has a milk protein allergy and possibly something else, I can't remember.  She did ask Abby to be quiet, which scared Abby which caused her to be quiet.  Then she left and had a dietician come in and tell me to stop eating.  Just kidding, it just feels that way.  Apparently I am on a kosher diet now or something.   The doctor came in and took Abby on a tour while the dietician talked to me which was immensely helpful, and she did say that for how long she waited Abby was very good.   So the dietician said to keep trying to get him to take cereal and suggested a few tricks to help get it down.  It was helpful.  We then scheduled an upper GI with speech pathology.  That will be done Thanksgiving week.  The dietician was more personable than the doctor and I felt like she listened more.  She thought that he might have some acid reflux issues which the upper GI would be able to diagnose.  We then went to the lab where two big men tortured Josh.  This test is to confirm the milk protein allergy, lead poisoining, iron count, and cbc.  All in all we were there for four hours.  And I got to pay $10.00 in parking.  When I go back next month I will just pay the $10.00 for the valet.  I felt like it was a productive visit.  I felt like they were helpful and knowledgable.  But I also really really hope that I get to cancel all this nonsense and just have my little boy eat.

Honey Am I Hormonal?

So for the last several weeks I have been off center.  Struggling to be myself in basic, basic ways.  Part of this may be this or that but most of it, I believe, is lack of estrogen.  Apparently nursing causes estrogen levels to drop.  I experienced a similar phenomena when Abby was 1 year old.  I tried going to a CNM when it happened 3 years ago.  Her grand solution was to have me stop nursing.  Just stop.  Since Abby was not ready and neither was I it simply wasn't an option.  Now with Josh not eating solid foods it definitely isn't an option.  With a handful of stewing skeptisism I headed to the doctors office. She was actually helpful and I agreed with her treatment plan.  So hopefully I can stop asking Adam "Honey am I hormonal".

Josh's Dr Appointment

Today I took Josh to his 1 year old visit.  He is our kid that always has something.  Abby was there because we were going to get her flu shot but then I decided against it.  But she was there.  Obnoxiously there.  Going to the doctors office is as bad if not worse that being on the phone with her.  "Mommy I need to talk to you!  Mommy I need to talk to you!  Mommy I LOVE YOU!"  Yes cute but not when she is drowning out any potentially important information from the practitioner.  So anyway I told the nurse that Josh still will not eat.  I am worried because he doesn't sleep well and he felt lighter to me and I think he is hungry.  If he were sleeping better and maintaining his weight or not acting so hungry I wouldn't be concerned.  But I was.  It just so happened that the np previously worked for the feeding disorder clinic.  She said that he definately needs to get in.  So we were wrapping up that lovely conversation about how he has sucked his little mouth into a weird shape and how obnoxious Abby is when he tripped over the nurse's chair and face planted it.  Again.  Yes blood all over the place.  Again.  3rd time in less than a week.  I swear this kid is trying to push me into a nervous breakdown.  I nearly cried  He screamed.  The nurse told me to breast feed him.  I think she didn't want to listen to him cry anymore.  His nose is very swollen.  He lost 1/2 lb this month.  That's really hard for me.  I like him chunky.  I'm ready for the help.  She also gave me a referral to see an allergist to make sure that he is not allergic to the food I am trying to feed him.  It was a helpful although distressful visit.  Atleast it was helpful.  It would have been cooler if nothing was wrong with him.  If his nose didn't meet the ground in such a horrible way and if he would just eat anything besides shoes and plastic.  I would be less grumpy.  

A Fall Picture for Becca