Thursday, October 30, 2008

Joshua Kelsey-Aaron Brown

It's been a little over a week since Josh arrived. We went in the night before and I was given some pills to start labor. It worked around 4:30 am as previously stated. I didn't use any pain medication until I was a 6 or a 7 and then I had stadol. I thought that it would be nice to use pain medication during transition. I learned that pain medications stall my labor. And that hitting transition stalls my labor. We called Becca sometime around noonish it seems and she was with me and Adam until Josh was born. It was really nice to have her there. Both Adam and Becca did a lot to help me. So did the nurses. I had really good nurses this time around. I ended up with Pitocin around 3 or 4 it seems. Transition, when it finally hit, was the single most painful thing I have ever experienced. We also had to turn Josh from posterior to anterior. As soon as he was anterior it was time to push. It took me a while but I finally did it. In the end I was really glad to have done it without an epidural. All in all it was about 14 hours.
Admittedly this is not a well composed blog. I had VERY little sleep last night. Anyway my biggest fear came after transistion when someone said they needed to get ready. I paniced and thought that they were going to do a C-Section. I felt so defeated at that moment, ready to but too tired to fight. It was in the back of my mind the whole time that I was going to end up with a C-Section. I remember asking what they were getting ready to do and someone finally replied that they were getting ready for me to give birth. That was probably the most relieving thing for me personally.
My biggest fear for Josh was when he came out and didn't breathe right away. It seemed like an eternity before he started crying. Becca and Adam later told me that the nurse paged the NICU but by the time they got there everything was okay and Josh was breathing just fine, with an APGAR of 8/9. We asked Dr Wai about it and he said it wasn't a big deal; that if anyone gets the feeling that something is wrong then that person goes ahead and calls the NICU. I wonder if they didn't call the NICU because it was a really tight fit for Josh to come out and it had been a long labor. I don't know. Dr Wai's explanation seemed weak to me.
The recovery was remarkably better. It was awesome to walk on my own, go to the bathroom on my own, be able to move my body on my own...I was pretty loopy until I came home from the hospital. The IV drugs definately took their toll but not worse than an epidural. Also I was taking oral narcotics while I was in the hospital after I gave birth. But everything was so much better. I was a lot less swollen and far more mobile. So the experience was much better this time. This, by the way, is not an anouncement of intent to do it again.
Josh is a wonderful baby. He is very handsome and melts my heart. Big sister Abby can not resist him either. It is so fun and exciting to have a baby again. Even though I am exhausted and broken I still love taking care of my babies.
(BTW spell check is not working so this is how I spell when I am very tired. Pitiful eh?)

Tuesday, October 21, 2008



Monday, October 20, 2008

Everything will be better tomorrow...

Ahem. Anyway it might be. Yesterday I was a complete and total wreck. Needless to say for those who were around. I slept horribly last night. But I feel a little better today. I don't know why. I just got back from my dr appointment. He said nothing had changed. This news is especially disheartening because I have been in pain and having contractions, although they are irregular. This news was heralded with the fact that since last Tuesday I have grown 2cm more. I can feel the strain on my body of this child just gestating and getting bigger and bigger. So the pains that I have been experiencing were not labor pains, simply growing pains. Now I just hope that he is not too big.
On the brighter side I will go in tonight to try some tablets to get things going. If that does not work then he will break my water. Ultimately I suppose we will do pitocin and if all else fails at some point they will cut me open and pry the little darling out. I may die first. For the first time Dr Wai, although he says it will be 'excruciatingly painful' seemed supportive of not getting an epidural. So wish me luck for tomorrow.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Do you want a Redo?

Since I have cancelled my induction and ALL of the previous guesses were wrong I thought I would invite you all to cast a second guess. I already bought the prize so it seems like a waste not to have someone be right. Dr Wai has rescheduled my induction for Tuesday, but who knows what I'll actually do right? I'm not even sure at this point if I will show up for it. For fairness sake I feel like I should say that last checked (Tuesday) I'm at 2 and 50% and -1.

If I could I would...A Rant

So whenever I run into an old man (defined by the partially bald, gray hair) I am harrassed. I went to WalMart today and my friendly greeter asked me when I was due. I told him today. He got flushed and nervous and said he didn't know what to do about that but he thought someone here would probably know...after all there are lots of women here. I'm not kidding almost verbatim what this man threw up out of his mouth. I calmed his public anxiety attack by telling him that labor would take a lot longer than what it takes me to shop. When I finished walking at the track on Tuesday I went to pick my card up. Again another old man. He literally thanked me for not having the baby while I was walking up there and expressed to me his grave concern that he would have to deliver my baby. Like 20 minutes is all it takes to get a kid out. I told him that he wasn't out of the woods yet and that he and I might end up on the evening news together. Grrrr. Don't get me wrong I receive comments and stares from all people, but the most outrageous comments are from old men.
Rant #2
So recently I have come to realize that my biggest bias against people isn't particularly your looks but your smell. Somehow in the cross hairs of my mind I have come to assimilate largeness with smelliness but an epiphany occured when I found myself thinking that a stinky person was fat. And they weren't. They were just stinky. On the flip side if you don't smell then I generally don't think of you as big, large or fat. Even if you are. I have put a lot of thought into the stinky thing recently.
If you mention that someone is stinky then you are considered shallow, like if someone is fat. But what happened to the responsibility of the smelly person to do their best not to offend. Why is it that I am expected to suffer with my eyes watering not saying anything about the lack of hygiene? Why is it not socially acceptable for me to request a more friendly hygiene regiment? Why is it more rude of me to ask someone to shower than for them to not shower in the first place? This also goes for the more often offense of poor oral hygiene. I genuinely do not know why it is so out of place to voice my discomfort. I know that I have my smelly moments. Like after I workout, or before I shower in the morning, or on hot Texas days when the only way to avoid sweating is the removal of sweat glands...But there is the effort factor. I am not talking about intermitent or circumstantial smelliness. I am talking about the offense of poor hygiene. I am tired of suffering in smelly silence. I want to feel free to tell you if you smell, and if you are younger than me I probably already have.
Some of you maybe wondering what exactly brought this on. Let me just simply state that I have found that inconsistent and poor hygiene is rampant. I have found it in every place, generation, and culture. It can be a lack of education, a family thing, an individual thing, a group thing...there does not seem to be a group of caste of people that is untouched by nasty hygiene by some individuals or groups; much like drugs.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My Big Decision

So I spent a lot of this morning and afternoon in a quandry. I just didn't feel right about being induced tomorrow. I felt really nervous and unsure. I prayed and didn't feel any better about going through with it. And it was the daytime so I wasn't in agony. That always helps. I just felt really sure that if I wait a few more days that maybe he will come on his own-which is what I have been praying for. So I cancelled the induction. I was immediately rescheduled for Tuesday or so. I'm not sure exactly when. Dr Wai apparently doesn't like to let mom's go more than a few days after their due date. This is attributed to the break down of the placenta. I think that being induced next week would be okay. Ofcourse I said that last week too. So no baby. No induction tomorrow. I feel a lot less nervous and scared. I didn't realize how much stress it was causing me until I started to feel excited about cancelling it. Hopefully this is the right decision. Hopefully everything will just happen and I won't face an induction date again.

Monday, October 13, 2008

No baby yet...

I'm up at 2:30 am because my back hurts really really bad. I've tried rubbing it and all sorts of things but it just won't go away. Could William and Becca be in a dead heat? Probably not. Probably this is just another sleepless night. I have had a lot of these, although tonight is particularly bad. Dr Wai predicted today as well. I guess there are still 21.5 hours left in the day. There might still be hope that my next sleepless night is caused by and infant and not incredible pain.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Names are Never a Sure Thing

Anyway for a lengthier discussion you can check out Adam's blog. The name that he did come up with that I still really like is Joshua Kelsey. I even already wrote it on the blanket. So that will most likely be his given name. Ofcourse we will call him Batman. Continue to post your predictions on my website. If you are right I will send you some batman themed bag of candy (it is Halloween time I should be able to find something...) Thank you to everyone who has predicted so far. No one has predicted my actual due date/induction date.

I was originally scheduled to be induced on the 13th but changed it to my due date of October 16th for a few reasons. I want those extra couple of days. It would kill me to know that if I had just held out a day or two more that I could go on my own. I just feel like I owe myself to go until then. It works out better for Adam too. This way he will be done with Cancer Conference and won't have to worry about how it goes. The only time he left on a Wednesday it was not good. So this way he will have a day or two back at work before he has to do the Cancer Conference again. Also I am nervous about being induced in general. Even though we have scheduled it for the 16th I might push it back again. I'll just have to wait until next week to see how I feel.
I know that I am facing a big baby. But the last time I had pitocin and an epidural it was no good. I never want to do that to my body again. I hope to at least avoid the epidural. I am going to ask for something else first. I decided my first line of defense will be Tylenol. That's what I usually take when I have migraine. I am too much of a wimp to take much more than that. I have a greater fear of pain medications than pain. If I think that I am going to cry with a migraine then I will take Aleve. So after Tylenol I will try the IV drugs. I guess if I am still in labor and the IV drugs don't work then I will as a last resort go for the epidural.

The other thing deterring me from an epidural is my previous experience with Pinnacle Anesthesiologists. This is the name of the group that is contracted with the hospital I will deliver at. When I had the D and C a year ago they billed me 6 weeks after I had the surgery. The letter said the amount due and a due date of 30 days later. 1 week later I received another bill stating that I was past due. Less than 1 week after that I received a bill stating that I was in danger of going to collections. It had not even been 9 weeks since my surgery nor 3 weeks since my original letter nor had the original due date passed. But I was in danger of going to collections. When I called the billing office they said that they had no control over the situation and that the best thing for me to do in order to avoid going to collections was to pay the bill in full. They could not alter their computer to reflect the original due date that was stated in my first letter. They could not alter their computer to put my account in good standing. They also said they could not alter their computers to not make months equal to weeks. They also could not work out a payment plan that would put my account in good standing with them. Grr so thinking about dealing with them again will hopefully help my resolve to not have an epidural.